3/9/2018 1 Comment I LOVE My Church's Toilet PaperYes, you read that correctly. And nope, it’s not clickbait to talk about something completely unrelated! I really love my church’s toilet paper; it’s actually in my top five favorite things about River of Life. Now, you might be saying, “Victor, your dad is the pastor. You should be biased about the church and have way more spiritual reasons in your top five.” Yeah, well, you can take a nap, Susan, because you haven’t tried our toilet paper yet! But what if I told you that there’s more to it than our church caring about your hygienic heinie? Allow me to set the scene…. You see, my dad was not always the pastor of River of Life. There is a process to hiring a new minister, and it usually involves a sermon or two to introduce the candidate to the congregation. There are interviews, voting, etc. When Dad came to preach his sermon for this church, he brought our family along. At some point, I had to use the restroom, and was absolutely amused and grateful for such a fantastic experience! I mean, think about it: most restaurants, your workplace, gas stations, and even other churches have terrible toilet paper! It either provides the sensation of sandpaper, the durability of wet sand, or both! And yet in this seemingly small town, hours from home, in an unfamiliar environment, there was toilet paper that made me stop and think. And so, from literally having good toiletries, I have decided upon three things that I’ve come to value very highly about our church. 1. It communicates thoughtfulness. As previously stated, most places that people visit, especially public places, have very cheap toilet paper. This is very understandable; it’s easier to buy in bulk, it’s cost effective, and lasts far longer (although that last one is hard to prove—I’ve used a great deal of half-ply paper in one sitting!) than the good stuff. But the fact that the church chose to spend more money on two-ply quality paper communicates to me that they genuinely care about people and the experience they have here. This was underscored even further by how the congregation warmly welcomed my family from Day One, and continue to welcome new people and take a refreshingly authentic interest in their lives. 2. It's the little things. It was, and still is, intensely funny to me how riled up I get about the toilet paper. It’s something so silly and simple, yet I haven’t forgotten it. We’re talking over two years ago, people, and I still remember how fascinated and impressed I was that we were cared for so generously in the little things. Things that are probably overlooked, and maybe even taken for granted by most. Doug, one of our elders, asks me every single week how my job is going. It’s actually something I look forward to talking about with him, even if it’s one or two sentences, and even if the job wasn’t so great that week. Something so small and simple, yet it sticks with me because they stack up and make a bigger impact than we realize. 3. It showed me I mattered.Now, before you roll your eyes, let me be clear that my family and God already tell me that I matter; I didn’t need ultra plush paper to tell me that. But for many people, church has been an encounter where either nothing is the matter, or everything is. But my trip to the bathroom stall set the stage for me to tell you something very different. See, the only real place I could think of that has the same toilet paper…is my home. My home is a welcome place of receiving love, refreshing spirit, and reviving life. And that is exactly how I felt, and feel, at my church.
Something that we always say at River of Life is that “You matter to God, and you matter to us.” From the toilet to the pulpit, this holds true. You are welcomed, loved, and surrounded by real people who want you to experience the love of God. And boy, do you ever. If you come—and you are always welcome—you will be blown away as soon as you walk in the door by a loving and genuine congregation. You’ll experience heartfelt and passionate worship, and witness committed and faithful people serving the King! Your kids will encounter engaging and energetic children’s ministry, and you’ll hear the prayerfully delivered Word of God by an awesome pastor. Not to mention, everyone can indulge in amazingly soft toilet paper! Just don’t forget to wash your hands before you go shaking them. ;-)
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10/20/2016 0 Comments To Stand in Front...To Stand Against"When the mob and the press and the whole world tell you to move, your job is to plant yourself like a tree by the river of truth, and tell the whole world---'No. You move.'"---Captain America The announcer's voice rings from the rooftop, and trumpets echo through the streets. Slowly, everyone around you is kneeling. Bowing to the statue of gold, in the image of a king. Your two friends place a hand upon your shoulders; you had all talked about this and agreed. Instead of kneeling, you would stand. Some of you may recall me using the example of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego before, when I talked about what happens when God doesn't give you what you ask for. I'm not usually one to repeat myself, but I felt like I had to use this story again for an encouragement during the times we have found ourselves in. Election time, that is. In my last blog I talked about not simply standing for the things we believe in, but standing in front of what could threaten what we stand for. This time, I believe I need to talk about what that means in greater detail. Because when you stand in front of something, or someone, it means you're standing in their way. You're standing against them. In case you didn't get it last time, I'm voting for Donald Trump. Not that he was my first choice, mind you. But he's the best shot at standing in front of Hillary and all that she promises to accomplish that can hurt this country. Some think I am an idiot for this. Others consider me hateful or intolerant. I can assure you I am none of these things, and that most who think this of me did not view me as such...until I stated my political choice. You may find yourself in a similar boat, so I want to share with you three things that need to be taken into consideration when you stand in front of something, to defend what you say you stand for. One: Just because you fight for something, doesn't make you a hateful person.It would seem nowadays that the act of standing for what are supposed to be "traditional" Christian values is viewed as hateful. Just a few days ago I read a post that was written by someone who is supposed to be a pastor, that talked about Christians not actually being pro-life, because we viewed the baby as only valuable if it didn't grow up to be gay, if it was white, or if the child would always agree with our beliefs at every turn. First of all, let me just apologize on behalf of actual Christians to all who have been affected by people that are truly hateful and yet claim to follow Christ. I am truly sorry that you have only seen a tainted version of Christianity. But just like not all vegans are hateful of people who eat meat, not all---I daresay not most---Christians hate people who don't believe like them. Both groups of people are just defined by the loudest in their circles, and unfortunately few hear the real story (side note: no, I am not a vegan). Jesus died and rose again for everyone, because He loves everyone. The choice to believe and accept His gift of eternal life is yours. Whether you accept Him or reject Him, He loves you. So then, how could I not do my best to love you like He does, if I am supposed to emulate Christ? As a pastor's kid, of the millennial generation, who strives to be like Jesus despite my own shortcomings, I can assure you that I do my best to love you like Jesus does, whether you believe like me or not. But that doesn't mean I have to agree with you. After all, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego literally defied the ruler of a nation, but they were unfailingly polite and respectful to their king, even when he threatened them with death. (Daniel 3:16-18) They even held their tongue when his attempt to kill them failed! Just because I hold you accountable or believe differently than you does not mean I am filled with hate. It means I believe something is worth fighting for. Which also means that probably, so do the people who hold the opposite view. Two: Just because someone else fights against you, doesn't make them a hateful person.As an author, I have to develop the mind of every important character in my writings. Not just the hero, but the villain as well. It took me far too long to realize something crucial about not only the art of a writer, but the art of a human being: the villain hardly ever believes that what they are doing is wrong. The villain of the story almost always views himself/herself as the hero of it. And so do their henchmen/supporters/voters. They are willing to lay down their lives for their cause, just like the hero is. Usually, the villain's motives are impure, but relatable. A lost love, a grave injustice, the desire for power to right the wrong that was done to them. Now, with proper logic, reasoning, conversation, or even therapy, the villain can see that they are just that---the antagonist. But in real life, the line is much harder to draw for many people. So if you are friends, or even relatives, with someone who you believe is siding for the antagonist, you may very well be correct in your stance. But try to remember that the villain is lost, and those who follow them are lost, too. A cutting Facebook comment, subtweet, or passive aggressive statement is not going to help either of you. The best thing to do is to love them as you always should have, even if they don't reciprocate. You can remain resolute without being resentful. Or remorseful. Speaking of which.... Three: If what you're standing for is important, use it for inspiration, not instigation.I will say something about what I have seen in these debates, and the overall campaign on both sides: there is very little talk about the real issues. Even the media focuses on what Clinton said about Trump, and vice versa. A question about how to tackle international issues is answered with an attack on the opponent's character and/or performance. You do not have to stoop to this. My writing started because I desired to change the world. I first wanted to be a superhero, like many of us have always dreamed. But since I could not fly, I created characters who could. Only recently have I discovered that my characters reflected my writing in a very unfortunate way: Both were trying to fix the world. Something that neither I nor my fictional characters were supposed to do. I cannot fix the brokenness of people with my words, and I couldn't fix it even if I could fly. Firstly, only Jesus can save. (John 14:6) But I was called to do something very special, just like all Christians are: I am called to be the example. You do not have to ask me Who I follow, but I will follow Him just the same. You do not have to ask me what I stand for, but I will stand for it anyway, even in---especially in---the face of opposition. It is worth noting, King Nebuchadnezzar was inspired by the resolve of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego so much that he desired to follow the one true God. It could have been very different if the three friends had a cowardly attitude, or a nasty one. So if you are standing against something to be the example of a Christ-like life, take heart. It is okay to be filled with righteous indignation. It is normal to be ridiculed and insulted. Your willingness to stand is a testimony, and even if it inspires no one, which I find very unlikely, you will still have been obedient, and that is worth it in and of itself. To carry the loving example of the Savior of the world is well worth fighting for.
Having done all you can do to stand, stand. (Ephesians 6:13) May you be encouraged, and may you stand with us. As one. The title got ya, didn't it? Admittedly, I did start this blog post ready to honestly say that the American Christian sucks at being American. I had a slew of paragraphs ready to blast people for thinking they could successfully vote in a third person---as if enough people would actually agree on a single third party candidate. However, I instead have decided to ask you two simple questions. The first is, "What do you stand for?" Do you stand for the unborn to be defended as if they are actually a viable life? Do you stand for an economy where you don't have to worry about another crash like the early 2000s? Do you stand for something that---while not directly in line with your beliefs---could help our country instead of hurt it? Allow me to go back in time, for a moment, to the 2012 election. My heart sank as the person I had voted for---someone I believed to be the lesser of two evils---had lost. Mitt Romney was not my first choice. But I voted for him on principle, because I didn't believe the country deserved another four years of the Obama administration. I found out that for a nation that was supposed to be founded on Christian beliefs, we are constantly in conflict. As I scroll on social media, as I even talk with friends with whom I am supposed to share nearly the exact same religious beliefs, I find us to be a people most divided, at the pettiest of things. Some of us think that we can vote for a third candidate, others have decided that they won't vote at all. Even more so, a great deal are afraid to speak their desired choice at the risk of being judged as racist, intolerant, or hateful. Can I just say something? You are all lying to yourselves at this point, and lying to yourself...is still a sin. Just like last election, you think that you can vote for someone who holds more closely to your beliefs, and your conscience will be clear. But if Dr. James Dobson---someone who has interacted with presidents and committees and continuously addressed the moral issues of our country unashamedly---can cast his vote for Trump, as he has already stated, then so can you. So, I am going to do my absolute best to ask the Holy Spirit to speak through me with three truths. Regardless of who you've chosen to vote for already, this may or may not sway you. But at least I'll know that I've spoken my piece. Also, let me just say that I've seen people making statements that Lincoln was a third party candidate. He wasn't. The Republican Party nominated him as their candidate in 1860. You know, the same party that Trump's a part of. One: There is NEVER going to be a perfect candidate. Yeah. Sure, we all know this one is true. Of course no one is perfect. We tell ourselves that every time we go over the speed limit to beat the guy in front of us to McDonald's. But if he/she is going to lead MY country, they better believe every single thing I believe to be important! Did Trump say disrespectful things to women/people of other races/other politicians/etc.? Yes he did. Has he apologized? Yes. (AND: As of the date of this article, I've seen news reports that the allegations of sexual assault were false, by the way.) Does he believe every single thing that I, a pastor's kid with a deep love for Christ and a desire to see broken people find healing and forgiveness in the arms of Jesus? No. Of course he doesn't. He is a rich, aggressive businessman. But he does believe abortion is murder. He doesn't like Obamacare. He is more or less a Republican, which does hold as close to my beliefs as a political party is going to. Which brings me to my second point. Two: You are not a bad person for voting for Trump. Regardless of what you believe about Trump, you're not like him if you vote for him. I think Tom Cruise is a great actor, but I'm not a Scientologist. I can appreciate a lettuce wrap, but I'm certainly not a vegan. I can vote for Trump and not be a racist or an intolerant, hateful person (which I don't believe Trump is, but whatever). I said at the beginning I was going to ask you two questions. The first was, "What do you stand for?" But the second is a better question: What do you stand in front of, to defend it? Three: It's not just about what you stand for. See, everyone stands for something. But I know of very few Christians who will stand in front of something to fight for what they say they stand for. Sure, you can post all the status you want, protest in front of whatever abortion clinic you want. I'm not saying those are wrong or ineffective; I've done my share of things like that. I am saying that America was supposed to be a nation by the people, for the people. We are the ones who vote. We decide who is in office, governing our nation! Are you going to stand in the way of someone who has lied, let soldiers die on foreign soil when she could've helped, and broken multiple laws? Or are you going to stand in the way of someone who said some mean things? If you don't stand in front of Hillary and all the things that she promises that are going to negatively affect this country, then you not only didn't defend what you say you stand for...I don't believe you really stood for it in the first place. We have to stand, we have to stand in front of the democratic party's agenda, and we have to stand as one.
And if we don't stand as one, it won't be Trump's fault. It won't be Hillary's fault. Or the dang liberals, or the kid who mows your lawn. It will be your fault. What will you stand in front of? Ah, Edna Mode. The eccentric, brilliant, super-suit designer of the forgotten era of heroes. She's intense, inventive, and intuitive. It's that last one we want to focus on today, because I have discovered that Edna not only knew Syndrome...she's responsible for a great deal that goes on during the plot of this movie. I even made a post about it a couple years ago on Know Your Meme, and it actually drew a lot of attention. However, my theory has reached a new depth, and I have four points to blow your mind. 1. She knows Bob was recruited by SyndromeWhen Bob (Mr. Incredible) goes to Edna for a patch job on something that "happened a long time ago," the super-suit designer talks about how she now designs suits for supermodels instead, but complains that there's "nothing super about them." Just selfish young girls, not selfless heroes proudly flying around in her designs. And when she makes Bob's new suit, Edna states that the suit will be ready before his next assignment. But how does she know when his next assignment is? Sure, she could've been confident that she could get it done quickly, but what if his next assignment was that night? If she's always got her ear to the ground of the supers, wouldn't it make sense to know about this plan of Syndrome? And speaking of the ears to the ground.... 2. She knows because she was recruited tooImagine you're Syndrome. Your whole plot revolves around wanting to be more super than any hero ever was, because you were rejected by your idol. But who would design your suit? You could make it yourself, but let's face it: the patchwork onesie didn't go so well. So he tracks down nearly every superhero on file, using his vast resources and impressive intellect. If he could track superheroes, how easy would it be to track their designer? Syndrome wants a great suit for his new hero life, so he naturally would want the best person for the job: Edna Mode. Maybe she gets a vibe that Syndrome isn't truly heroic, but agrees to craft the suit anyway. And the final product is pretty sleek looking. But because she knows he's evil, she formulates a plan. And the funny thing is.... 3. The plan benefits EdnaBy designing the suit for Syndrome---and later Bob and his family---Edna's involvement is win-win. If Syndrome succeeds and takes over the world, everyone will be super, and she'll be able to design suits for everybody who wants one. But Edna isn't actually evil...business minded, but not evil. The world being ruled by a rich brat with hurt feelings would suck. But! If the supers won, good would triumph, and Edna would still get to make the uniforms once the heroes stepped out of the shadows. If one of the most popular heroes needed a new outfit, of course the others will, right? And she may have already started creating them. Remember when Helen (Elastigirl) was walking down the hall with Edna? There were a few mannequins along the wall that had costumes on them. Were they there because Edna was bored, or did they hold suits of other heroes that Syndrome had pitted against his robot and lived? During the sequence where Incredible is looking through the list of fallen supers, the computer shows that a couple of them bested a couple of the machines before they died on their second attempt. Maybe their first victory caused them to go to Edna to design a new suit for them as well, reinvigorated just as Bob was. And since so few of them got a second try, it could be why we only saw three or four mannequins. It could even be a memorial to each one that Edna had trusted in, but couldn't succeed. But Edna doesn't look back. Syndrome must be stopped, and it's only a matter of time before the best hero is "recruited." So to make sure that Syndrome actually fails.... 4. It's all in the detailsEdna successfully designs suits for the entire Incredible family, and puts careful thought into each one. She's literally a fashion genius, privy to function, and very particular about what does and doesn't go on a super-suit. A hero's uniform has to be flawless. Failure in this could result in catastrophe, either for the world, or for fashion. For the plan to come to ultimate fruition, her old friends needed to succeed, and Syndrome needed to fail. First, I find it unlikely that Syndrome would have designed his costume with that color scheme. He wanted to be loved and admired, seen in the light as a false hope for the world. And yet...his costume is almost entirely black, save for the white "S." The Incredibles' costumes, however, are bright and lively, a stark contrast to the "hero" in their way. It is more plausible that Edna designed it this way so there would be no question who the real heroes were. But the real kicker, is what Edna put as the icing on the cake. Or should I say, icing on the cape? You see, Edna was significantly specific about not giving any other hero a cape, because of how dangerous it is to the wearer. Even in one of the fashion-failure-flashbacks, a heroine's cape became caught in a jet turbine...just like Syndrome. Edna knew that no matter what, the cape would be Syndrome's downfall. She could've even made it just long enough that it was more of a hindrance than any other cape before it, so there was a greater chance of it getting snagged during a confrontation.
And that, my friends, is why Edna is not only responsible for a majority of the events in The Incredibles...she's also a hero of the story. If the theory is true, Edna Mode carefully orchestrated a grand plan, putting faith in the heroes she had trusted and worked with for years before...but also making sure they would succeed. Quite literally, in fact, by her own design. Liked the theory? Share this post with a friend! And while you're here, you can check out some of my other blogs, or take a look at my books! 4/29/2016 0 Comments Even if He Doesn't....Just for a moment, picture yourself in a distant land. It's not your home; no, you were ripped from your home many years ago, by people that literally took over the entire country you lived in. Still, you've got a good thing going so far. You've moved up the ranks so well that you and two of your closest friends are trusted advisers of the king. Sadly, you had a disagreement with him and his laws, and you and your friends have now found yourselves in danger of execution.
Most Christians (and those who grew up watching the first VeggieTales episodes) know the story of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego. Fiery furnace, rescued by God, everybody celebrates and worships Yaweh instead of a ridiculous statue of the egotistical King Nebuchadnezzar. Most know the story of their bravery, their divine rescue, and their faith. But for the life of me, I can barely recall any mention of four words in their final speech before being thrown in the flames. Check it out: "Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego replied, 'O Nebuchadnezzar, we do not need to defend ourselves before you. If we are thrown into the blazing furnace, the God whom we serve is able to save us. He will rescue us from your power, your majesty. But even if He doesn’t, we want to make it clear to you, your majesty, that we will never serve your gods or worship the gold statue you have set up.'" (Daniel 3:16-18) Did you catch that? "Even if He doesn't...we won't kneel." Even if He doesn't. I remember praying multiple times, "God, if you would just do this one thing, I promise to...." I've done that to my parents, too. I think that everyone has done something like this. Maybe not out loud, but perhaps we slouch in work because we didn't get the promotion or raise we wanted. Or a significant other gets shunned for the day on account of an argument (later discovered as not that big of a deal). Whatever it is, you've already made your comparison in your own life; to list out the rest here is just a waste of my brain power. But we make that kind of ultimatum all the time, don't we? Shadrach and friends didn't have that issue. Their resolve was so great that even if they were burnt to an absolute crisp, they were happy with their decision. It was completely possible that God would not rescue them from that fire. The cause and purpose, but more, the God they believed in was worth risking the very real chance of death. I recently had asked God for something I had deeply longed for, and these past few weeks, I believed He had placed it within my grasp. The opportunities were too coincidental for it to be an actual coincidence, and everything eventually hinged on one moment. For days I waited, praying for the follow-through to swing in my favor. But once again I found myself drawn to that passage. And so I told God that I knew He could make this event happen for me. But, even if He didn't, I would remain steadfast. I would remain faithful. I would remain thankful, even, for His plan that I can't even begin to fathom from this point of view. Spoiler alert: the ending did not result in my favor. At least, not my immediate favor. Though disappointed, I kept my promise. God could've made it happen. Alas, He did not. Sometimes it is just because He allows life to get in the way, but other times it's because He has something better for us. Something we can't imagine having, or even that we wanted it, because only He knows, for the moment. Even funnier to me is that God could've stepped in anytime before they were thrown in. He could have shown up while the king was arguing with them and been like, "So. I heard you've got a statue. That's cool. The whole Earth is My footstool. Hey, you know what's on Earth? Your statue." Instead, He let's them get thrown in this raging furnace so hot that being even near it kills people. Sometimes God lets us go through the fire. But we're not there alone, even when we think we are. Not only did Shadrach and his compatriots have each other, but God took it upon Himself to go in the fire with them. Just like now, whatever fire you feel like you've been thrown into---even one you didn't ask for nor deserve---God is in the fire with you. I wonder if Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego felt the heat of the furnace. The Bible tells us that they weren't burned, and didn't even smell of smoke. But I wonder if they felt the heat, even just a little bit. Or maybe, they were focused on what God was saying to them. He didn't even take them out right away. He let all their accusers and oppressors see them in the fire alive, with Him. Eventually, whatever it is you're going through, that fire that God has not spared you from, you can still allow God to grow you, to burn away the impurities and come forth like gold. He can take your situation and use it to help you grow stronger in Him, and everyone that helped turn that furnace hotter will see that not only was God faithful (as He always is)...but so were you. I pray that no matter what comes my way, be it fire, foes, fear, or failure, that I can look at whatever obstacle or opposition it is and say, "Even if He doesn't...I won't kneel to this." So much destruction. Too dark. Disjointed. Longer than necessary. All these I have heard on the subject of not only Batman V Superman, but Man of Steel as well. I have seen each movie multiple times, and have come to a revelation, finally, on why there was and is so much hatred for Zack Snyder's last two superhero films.
Now, before we start, I'd like to address the main problem people have with Man of Steel. Superman doesn't actually save the world: Click here. With Batman V Superman, I've heard a few complaints on the new Lex Luthor, Wonder Woman's performance, Doomsday's presence, etc. There are also probably reviews telling people why the audio or the visuals suck. I'm going to go ahead and not deal with those. Not because I can't, but because they're only smaller pieces of a larger puzzle. Because your main problem is Superman. That's who this article is really for: those who just plain don't like this version of Superman. I'll do a review of the entire movie later this week, but for now, I'll just focus on this. In the comics, we complain because he's too goody-goody, too powerful, unable to relate to regular people like you and me. In the movies, we shout that "our" hero is too dark and brooding (but we love that color on Batman, right?), and that he doesn't do enough for the world. And you know what? Superman is dark in this movie, to a point. Never mind that he dedicates years to finding out who he is---like we do---and helping people along the way at great risk to his exposure. Forget that the symbol on his chest means "Hope." That he sacrifices his chances at recreating his world on Earth, this "Krypton" that he longed for, that he desired to understand and know. He chose our world instead. And we hate him for it. In Batman V Superman, Kal-El is bombarded with hatred for his actions on foreign soil, his accidental destruction of Metropolis while saving the rest of the ENTIRE PLANET. Restrictions are discussed regarding his very presence on Earth, and by the climax of the movie, most of the world (that we see) wants him gone. *SPOILER* *SPOILER* *SPOILER* *SPOILER* *SPOILER* *SPOILER* They get what they ask for. We hate Zack Snyder for the same reason we hate his version of Superman: he shows us that we are in fact just like the world in the movie. We clamor and wish that more people would do good in the world. That someone would be unfazed by politics and just focus on saving lives and being an example for the entire world to follow. And then when our expectations aren't met with exactly what we wanted...we turn on the very hero we asked for. It wasn't a very good movie, but Superman Returns had a very true quote by the man of steel himself: "You say people don't need a savior. But every day I hear the world crying for one." And those same people that cry for a savior hate him for being exactly what they cried for: good. Zack Snyder himself has stated that Superman is a Christ-like figure, and his movies showcase exactly that. Batman V Superman was released on Good Friday, just to hammer those last few minutes home. The original creators of Superman were Completed Jews (that is, they were Jews who believed Jesus is the Son of God). As such, they created Superman in a time where a symbol of inspiration was needed: during the last few years of the Great Depression. They based him on Jesus (fantastic book about that right here), and most people's hatred of Jesus is for the same reasons they hate Superman. Because we feel convicted. We hate Superman because most of us can't identify with him, but that isn't his fault. He's meant to be incorruptible, an icon, an inspiration, a light in the darkness. If we find ourselves hating him because of that, instead of wanting to emulate him, isn't the real problem...us? Luckily, Superman doesn't care. His example and capacity to inspire is greater than the hate. And Jesus sacrificed himself among his haters and non-believers too, because He knew that the plan and purpose was greater than anyone could even imagine. Superman wasn't there to only save America, and the Messiah didn't come to restore Jerusalem to its former glory. Batman V Superman deals with a dark Superman, but not because he is actually dark. It's because he's struggling to be a light in a world that tries to make him dark with their plotting, and their fear, and their hatred. In the end of the movie, the world got not only what it wanted, but what it deserved: the absence of the hero they wished for. They changed their mind once he left, but I wonder if it will stay that way when he returns. Funny how Snyder made a bigger parallel than you realize once you actually pay attention. I'm glad you asked! It's a pretty funny story, actually. I was working on my novel, Voltage, when I was just not feeling it. I had hit a snag, and I couldn't keep writing the story. I was so upset with myself, that I said, "I suck so much at writing a book, I could write a book about that!" Of course, what I said was in jest, but a light bulb turned on in my head anyway! I thought to myself, "You know, that actually might not be a bad idea!"
So I started writing the second book in the series, Why You Suck at Writing a Book, first. As I was writing that one, I had a couple people that were complaining about being stuck in the friend-zone. Just like that, two works of writing were inspired, and after weeks and months of writing, the Why You Suck series was born. I chose to start this series because I could write multiple smaller books, gaining a following and some experience as a published author, but it really means something to me. Helping people with humor has always been something I enjoy doing, and what better way than showing people that it's okay to laugh at themselves? It's been a great journey so far, and I'm excited to continue it. 3/28/2016 0 Comments 50 Shades of the Friend-Zone50 Shades of the Friend-Zone
Note: If you discover your shade(s), buy my book in the My Books page so you may escape the friend-zone with explosions and confidence! 1. Loves you like a friend. 2. Loves you like a brother. 3. Loves you like a sister. 4. Uses you as a step stool. 5. Calls you “such a good friend.” 6. Thinks you’re gay. 7. Sets you up with her gay best friend. 8. Sets you up with her best girl friend. 9. Invites you to a sleepover with every intention of sleeping. 10. Says, “I love you,” while laughing. 11. Finds way too many things you have in common. 12. Double-pull-back to avoid a kiss. 13. Asks for advice about her boyfriend. All. The. Time. 14. When going out to drinks, dances, movies, she qualifies, “just as friends.” 15. When she doesn’t qualify “just as friends,” because it’s already been established enough times. 16. Introduces you as her best friend. 17. Side hug. 18. High five. 19. Fist bump. 20. Handshake. 21. Says, “Why can’t guys be as sweet as you?” 22. Says, “You’re such a nice guy.” 23. Tells you you’ll find the right woman…someday. 24. Puts you as her Woman Crush Wednesday. 25. Calls you “babe” like she does to her girl friends. 26. Offers to share her lip gloss with you. 27. Being your friend turns her gay. 28. Being her friend turns YOU gay. 29. You’re the one taking the pictures of her and her boyfriend that she posts on Facebook/Instagram/Twitter. 30. You’re the best man at her wedding. 31. You’re the maid of honor at her wedding. 32. If you’re a Christian, you’re the “brother in Christ.” 33. She wants to have matching outfits. 34. Purposefully stays away from the mistletoe. 35. You get her under the mistletoe anyway, and she pecks you on the cheek. 36. Shows you chick flicks because she thinks you’ll like them. She thinks you’ll like Every. Single. One of them. 37. Doesn’t care if she sees you shirtless or not. 38. Doesn’t say that you’re hot or handsome. Just that you’re cute, sweet, or sensitive. 39. Texts other people no matter where you two are, especially when she’s texting a guy. This should be obvious, but whatever. 40. Compares you to her father. 41. Compares you to her grandfather. 42. Actually admits she friend-zoned you. 43. Points out the guy and girl best friends in the movie and says, “Look, they’re like us!” Then when they end up together, she corrects herself with, “Never mind." 44. Asks you to watch or hold her purse. 45. Takes you shopping for her date…with another guy. 46. Split the bill at movies/dinners. 47. Finds you normal, not mysterious or interesting. 48. When you ask why you can’t date her, she responds with an ambiguous answer like, “Because.” Or “because we’re friends.” 49. Farts or burps in front of you. 50. You didn’t have to read all fifty shades to find yours. 3/28/2016 0 Comments A Hobbit's TransformationI've always been a major Lord of the Rings fan. One of my favorite lines from the trilogy, spoken by one of the stupidest characters Pippin (Peregrin) Took, is, “I am a messenger of the King. …You are speaking to the King’s friend, and one of the most renowned in all the lands of the West. You are a ruffian and a fool. Down on your knees in the road and ask pardon, or I will set this troll’s bane in you!” This is something I've been thinking about for a long time, and a couple days ago I couldn't take it anymore. I had to write about it.
Pippin was a very incompetent character in the company to take the One Ring to Mordor. More than once was he called a “fool of a Took” by Gandalf. While there were times when Pippin had his good moments, in most of the story he was quite stupid and helpless, frequently hindering the rest of the group. However, he has a lot to teach us about a transformation through Jesus Christ. From the time he started to a lot of the journey, Peregrin Took was ridiculous. Though his heart was in the right place almost all of the time, he made his team's presence known to goblins in a cave made by Dwarfs, caused Boromir to protect him and Merry by sacrificing his life, and stupidly entered the service of a corrupt steward. Though these things he eventually made up for, it caused unnecessary trouble for the nine companions. To be fair, his good choices should be listed as well. He did help convince Treebeard to go to war with Isengard, and left a trail for Legolas and Aragorn to follow when captured by Orcs. He also faced death numerous times so that Sauron could be prevented from unleashing terror on Middle-Earth. He had some good moments, but apparently his past before the quest overlapped his good deeds. Nevertheless, Gandalf saw hope in him and Merry, and permitted them to come along on the journey to destroy the One Ring. Perhaps the hugest mistake he made was looking into Saruman's mystic stone, against Gandalf's orders, by which Pippin conversed with Sauron himself. In this regard, he fell to temptation. Countless times did this Took screw up, yet kept pressing on. As previously stated, Peregrin Took pledged service to the king of Gondor, who was then a corrupt steward named Denethor, left in charge of Gondor until the real king returned. While this was at first an unwise move, Aragorn returned and Denethor died. Pippin was commissioned by his king to continue to serve him wherever he went, and that he might call on young Took again. After he, Merry, Sam, and Frodo returned to the Shire, they were greeted by men who were causing trouble in the Hobbits' home. Right away two guards antagonized the four, and one insulted Frodo. At this disrespect of his friend, who had given everything to save Middle-Earth, Pippin could take it no more. He drew his sword, and the book states the other part of my favorite passage: “He cast back his cloak, flashed out his sword, and the silver and sable of Gondor gleamed on him as he rode forward.” Basically, the glory of his king shone upon this servant. Peregrin Took was a fool, a Halfling, and a weak one at that. But as he served his master, this little man was transformed into a noble, loyal, courageous warrior, who the king actually wanted to use. And so it can be with us, who are imperfect, unworthy sinners, as we give ourselves over to our King, ready and willing to serve Him in love to the end. |
Victor Sassano IIIAuthor of the Why You Suck Series. Adventurer. Warrior-Poet. Superhero enthusiast. Servant-Leader. Archives
March 2018
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